Friday, 31 January 2014

Black Velvet x 3

Hello lovelies!

I'm taking part in a blog link up with two lovely ladies today as we all have the same dress. Check out what Betty and Rachel have done with their dresses.

I love the studs in the mesh on the arms, and the mesh front and back is a nice touch. It gives a cheeky peek of my arm and back tattoos. It's lovely and soft and velvet always makes me feel glam. I didn't feel the need to accessorise with anything more than a hat as the dress speaks for itself.


I bought the dress in the Simply Be sale a couple of weeks ago. It was down from £50 to £20 - total bargain! I teamed it with my Yours 'robot' leggings - yes, the ones which got Betty Pamper a bit of heat from....what's the word? - miserable little sausages - on the Yours Clothing Facebook page a couple of weeks ago.

I wanted to try the leggings out as they're unusual to say the least. They feel like pvc on the outside (but are soft inside) and need constant hoiking up or else they wrinkle all over the place, as you can see in the close up above. They rustle like scrunched bin bags when I walk but they'll come in handy if I ever want to dress up as a fembot, ha!

See, this is what small-minded internet warriors don't get when they comment bitchily on someone's outfit on a social networking site. They concentrate on whether things 'suit', whether they're flattering or bitch about the size/shape of a person's body. They suck all the fun out of dressing up, they don't understand the joy clothes can bring. Who cares if things don't work? Surely it's better to experiment rather than being a boring old fossil?! These leggings won't get much use day to day, admittedly, but they're fun and sometimes I want to have fun with fashion! Fashion SHOULD be fun. While I'm preaching, I didn't want to wear a belt today as no fat person has the onus upon them to wear a belt to look more together. I wear clothes for MY eyeballs, not anyone else's. (OK, sometimes for my hubby, but other than that, nope.)

Next time I wear the leggings instead of trying to yank them up constantly to avoid the creases round my ankle I'll turn up the ankles, so that hopefully should sort out the creasing around the knees as well.




I sized up to a 30 because velvet can be unforgiving and I'm glad I did. It's relatively fitted through the boobs and waist before flaring out below.

Dress, £20 Simply Be
Hat, Primark (old.)
Leggings, Yours £5
Shoes, Rocket Dog

What's the most outlandish piece of clothing in your wardrobe? Tell me all about it. :) Don't forget to have a peek at Rachel and Betty's blogs.

Thanks for reading!

Thursday, 30 January 2014

About Love EVERY Body 3

Hello lovelies!

The third Love EVERY Body assignment is due on Sunday 2nd Feb, and this month our focus is on shoulders, arms and hands.

Think of the things you can do with your arms - hug people, cook, do your make up, do crafts, lift your kids etc - as well as the physical attributes like strength, softness etc. Feel free to include photos of tattoos, freckles, stretch marks, or anything else you want to share with us, but remember all the wonderful things you can do with your arms and hands is more important than the way they look. 

Here's a video where I talk about the third assignment, and also about posting on the day the assignment is due, if possible. I think some of the late posters are missing out on the buzz which happens on the Sunday the post is due, so I suggest that if you are going to post late (which can't be helped sometimes) let me know when your post is up so I can tweet about it and let the others know. When posts go up days or weeks late you're not going to get as much love on your post as you would if you posted it on the Sunday. I just want your posts to be commented on.

Anyway, listen to me waffle and let your eyes feast on Mr Momoa! ;)


Any questions?

I look forward to seeing your posts when they go up.

Tuesday, 28 January 2014

MUA Luxe lip velvets in Reckless, Criminal, Kooky

Hello honey buns!

Never have I been so conflicted about a product. I wrote about these MUA Luxe lip velvets about a month ago and I've changed my mind about them about 3 times since then. I'm still conflicted.

When I first got them I LOVED them because they were new and cheap (I'm easily pleased) but as time went on I realised a few drawbacks.

The next 3 photos are taken with flash.

Reckless

Criminal

Kooky



Firstly, they're £3, which is very reasonable for such bold colours. They last a long time on the outer lips, but wear in the centre of the lips when you eat or drink. The product is slightly thick and gloopy in the case of Reckless and Criminal and this means it's difficult to shape the lips correctly without making a mistake. Using a fine lip brush dipped in the product from the doe foot applicator it comes with may be an idea for precise application. Kooky applies most smoothly of the three as it's less thick and gloopy. Because the product is SO long wearing, when you do make a mistake you need to have a good make up remover at hand with a cotton bud to clean up straight away or it will NOT budge, and if you're not careful you run the risk of smearing the rest of your lips as you clear the mistake. I have done this a few times and then had to cover it up with concealer.

The product takes a minute or so to dry, and you have to wait with your lips parted or else they will stick together like you have PVA glue on them. I've done it and it's really not pretty! There's no discernible scent from a distance, but if you sniff the tube it smells faintly like an alcohol wipe. For just £3 there's no surprise they didn't add a scent. And now I come to the biggest downfall with these lip colours. When you want to remove them it gets ugly. They're very hard to remove from the outer area of your lips. I end up with product smeared all over my face and have to use a huge amount of make up remover to do so. From the nose down I end up covered in smeared lipstick.

How do they feel on? OK. Dry, matte obviously, but not too uncomfortable. You might have a problem if you have very dry lips, though. Because of the nature of the product I don't think it's suitable to go directly over lip balm, but a slick of balm half an hour beforehand so it can soak in probably won't harm.

Because of the wear from the centre of the lips and the mess they make when you want to remove them I can't give them a resounding approval, but they do look good when they're on if you're not eating and drinking. CONFLICT! I wouldn't say rush out and buy them, but I would say if you have a spare £3, try one and see what you think. Of the three I have, I think Kooky would be the only one I would repurchase, both because of the formula and the unusual colour. Purple lipsticks tend to be very patchy overall, so I'm pleased to have a good purple in my stash.

For me, their best use is to put them on at home when I have plenty of time for a precise application, and to wear them out for a couple of hours when I know I won't be eating and drinking. I don't personally think it's the kind of product you'd want to cart around for repeat applications, due to the care you need to take.

Have you tried these and if so, what do you make of them?

Thanks for reading.

Monday, 27 January 2014

Pour Moi? 'Imogen Rose' lingerie

Hello pickles!

Before Christmas I was lucky enough to win a competition on Hanna's blog and my prize was some Pour Moi? lingerie. 

Due to the Christmas post and an unfortunate mix up in the warehouse, I only got my underwear 2 days ago. I'd kind of given up hope of receiving my prize, but Hanna was fabulous in dealing with Pour Moi? directly throughout and we were in regular contact.

Want to see my spoils?! Of course you do! :)

I chose the Imogen Rose set in skin as I love skin tone undies for regular wear and Imogen Rose is the name of a perfume from Lush which I love. Don't judge me. ;)



The bra (£23) is a 44F and the knickers (£12) are a size 22. The knickers (I can't bring myself to say the word 'panties' without wanting to be sick in my mouth) actually fit me because they're extremely stretchy. I generally wear a 26-28 in knickers, for reference.


Eagle eyed readers may know I usually wear a 44 or 46E bra, but because the largest back size Pour Moi do is a 44 I sized up in the cup to compensate and it's a perfect fit. I have bra extenders in case a bra is particularly un-stretchy (the Goddess Kayla bras I wear aren't very stretchy in the back at all) but there's no need with the Imogen Rose bra as it's got quite a lot of give.

Because the uppermost third of the bra is lace I had to be very careful when adjusting my boobs into place. I don't know what your method of sorting out your lady lumps is, but when I put a bra on I do the back up, pull the straps up (and adjust if necessary) then lean forward to lift and plonk each boob into place whilst holding the top of the cup up with the other hand. When I did it with this bra holding onto the lace at the top there was a moment where I thought it might tear, so if you have heavy boobs like me adjust the girls with care. :) My Goddess bras are so sturdy I'm used to chucking my boobs in with abandon. Obviously lace needs more care, so next time I'll be more careful.


I love the little rose details on the bra and knickers, and the little 'peek a boo' detail in the back of the knickers is very cute too. The bra comes in back sizes 32-44 and up to a J cup, and the knickers come in sizes 10-22 (although some of them aren't showing on the website at the moment because they're out of stock.) They come in skin, white, black and slate, a dark grey.

Do you like matching sets? Would anyone like to see these modelled by moi? Sorry, I couldn't resist!


When I modelled these for hubs he gasped and said 'Matching underwear!' so I think that's a bit of a clue that I need to indulge a bit more often.

Thanks for reading.

Sunday, 26 January 2014

Crepe shirt dress OOTD

Hiya!

My dad and brother came down to visit last Monday so we went to town for lunch. On the way back through town I suggested going in the Heart Foundation charity shop (much to my brother's disgust) so my dad and I could have a peek at the bargains. I picked up this gorgeous heavyweight crepe shirt dress.


I love the contrast stitching, pocket and side slits at the bottom, plus it's a lovely length.


Shirt dress, British Heart Foundation charity shop
Sparkly vest, from Mookie
Belt, ASOS Curve sale - get it while the going's good!
Wet look leggings, Very via Miss Difusa
Patent flats, Evans
Double layer necklace, Superdrug (last year.)
Bracelet, Primark
Earrings, New Look
Ring, Bluebirds & Daisies

Thanks for reading and have a great Sunday (if it IS Sunday where you are right now!)

Saturday, 25 January 2014

Two things you NEED to know if you read my blog

Hiya lovelies! Happy Saturday.

1. Bloglovin has decided to unfollow a huge amount of the blogs I was following. I don't use the Google reader to read blogs any more, just Bloglovin, so it's been a major pain in the flange! I've been re-adding blogs as I think of them, but if you know I normally comment on your blog and haven't been doing so recently, you now know why! Please comment with your blog link so I can check I'm following you! Thanks. Also, new blogs (to me) feel free to leave me your link in the comments. I'm always looking for new blogs to follow.

2. Commenting on my blog with Disqus. I know a couple of people have told me my blog is too much hassle to comment on, and it got me thinking. As you may know, I use the Disqus comment system on my blog because it's a far superior system compared to Blogger's own. If you register with Disqus, then you have a log in and password so it literally takes two seconds to submit a comment on my blog, or any other Disqus-run blog. Every time - from a mobile, a pc, laptop or a tablet.

(Read on for the difference between guest commenters and registered commenters - it will explain why you might not have been informed of my replies.)

How to register with Disqus.


Then put in your email address, choose a username and a password and bingo!


Hit create account and you're done. You can save your username and password to your pc/laptop/tablet/phone if you so desire and then commenting on ANY blog which uses Disqus is a cinch from now on.

I had an account with Disqus so I could comment on Disqus-run blogs FAR before I wanted to use Disqus on my own blog. Likewise I have an account on Wordpress so I can comment on blogs who use Wordpress. It makes commenting so much easier than filling out your details everrrrrrrry time.

If you use the 'guest' function to comment on Disqus blogs, you will NEVER get an email notification that your comment has been replied to. If you create an account, every time you get a reply on a Disqus blog you will get an email to let you know. It's such a hugely beneficial way to keep up conversations, both as a blogger and a blog reader.

Some people blog and don't read, some people read and don't blog, but I do both. I LOVE being able to carry on conversations with my readers on my blog, and as a reader I love knowing when someone has replied to my comment. Who has time to keep going back to blogs to see if you've replied to?! No one!

So if you want to comment easily on my blog and want emails when I've replied to you, GO REGISTER! :)

I'm not being paid for this but I should be. ;)

Have a fantabulous weekend! We'll be going out somewhere today so we can take outfit photos.

Thought, questions? Have at it in the comments.

Thanks for reading.

Friday, 24 January 2014

Punky trews OOTD

Hiya pickles!

I've got a bit of an eccentric outfit post for you today.


I bought these tartan/leopard leggings in the Yours sale. I have a dress in the same print which I blogged here. I love red, tartan and leopard print so they're right up my alley. They're pretty full on, and I'm good with that. I love the zips at the ankle too. I think I'll wear them with ballerina flats next time as I don't like them with these shoes. Photographing outfits definitely helps decide what looks right.

Hat, Primark (years ago.)
Necklace, Black Heart Creatives
Dress, ASOS Curve (limited sizes left.)
Belt, ASOS Curve
Leggings, Yours Clothing sale
Shoes, Rocket Dog

What 'big' plans have you got to look forward to this year?

Thanks for reading. Have a great weekend!

Thursday, 23 January 2014

Take a chance

Hi.

I'd scheduled a film review for today but I zigged when I should've zagged and it posted in the wee hours yesterday, so here's a little something else.

When I was single or between relationships/bunk ups I had this idea in my head about the kind of man I'd end up with. I had the proverbial tall, dark and handsome in mind, but with a rock edge. I liked guys as tall and broad as oaks with hands like shovels. All the better if they had copious tattoos, curly hair and the kind of bold eyes which linger on a woman with no shame. The kind of guy who'd make me flush red just by him looking at me.

Maybe I read a few too many romance novels when I was a teenager or believed the crap on TV, but I had ideas about someone who would be physically strong and who would 'protect' me from life's ills.

Sometimes you don't get what you want (or what you think you want) but you get what you need.

It was April 2003, and my friend Helen and I were in our favourite London hangout, the Intrepid Fox rock pub in Soho. My then-friend Laurence had invited himself to my birthday drinks and had brought a couple of his mates along with him. Helen and I were standing on our own blatantly ignoring the men (we were being fabulous, naturally) when one of the guys came over. He asked me if he could borrow a hair band to tie back his long hair. I offered him up the one on my wrist, which was blue and sparkly, so he made a face and said no thanks. I thought no more of it; he wasn't my type.

I'd had quite a lot to drink that night, in fact I can't remember most of it. I know Helen and I went to a little hangout in Soho called Garlic and Shots, which comprises of a very cramped bar playing pounding metal downstairs and a tiny restaurant upstairs. The food and drinks are almost all garlic themed. I used to love their honey garlic vodka shot. Anyway, I digress. At some point the fellas turned up. Apparently I invited them, and apparently I attacked James with my mouth and tongue, as you do, and then they left, probably because I REEKED of garlic. (I tried to drink that shot sober once and nearly barfed all over myself. People used to kiss me after I'd downed 6 of them. Men will launch themselves at anything with a pulse, yo.)

I vaguely remember Helen and I going to Gossips, a really cool sleaze rock club in Soho. (I used to exist in Soho, despite actually living over 30 miles away at the time.) The wannabe hair-band borrower turned out to be called James, and he magically appeared in the club and very sweetly came up to me when I was at the bar (more booze, yuss!) and asked if he could put his arm around me. How cute. I was NOT used to this. We made kissy faces all night, and James kinda ground his crotch up against me like he was scratching an itch all night. This didn't put me off, alarmingly, even though he may have had crabs.

We arranged to meet again, and after a few weeks of us going out I had a serious conversation with myself about whether I could continue to be with someone that nice. CAN YOU BELIEVE IT?! I was so used to dating arseholes that when someone treated me like a human being I questioned if I deserved it. Holy shee-it.

As you can imagine I decided I did actually deserve to be treated nicely, and here we are almost 11 years down the line, and almost 2 years married.

The strength I sought from a man like an oak with hands like shovels I got in his quiet steadfastness. His roots are deep and he doesn't sway. I've never known someone on such an even keel. Nothing bothers him, he's always happy and he's a steadying influence on this highly emosh Aries bish.

The protection I sought in a man bigger than me I got in a man who takes care of my shelter, food, clothing and so many other needs while I'm too ill to work. He protects me by allowing me to be me, with all the complex mental and physical crap that entails, even if he doesn't understand it.

He loves me completely, and that isn't dependent on my shape or size. He's fancied me at all weights and compliments me every day. He often tells me I look/smell/feel nice, with a boyishly shy look on his face. It's so cute. He loves it when I wear tight fitting clothes or no clothes at all.

Best of all, we make each other really happy with very little effort. Every day when he comes home from work he has a cheeky 'I've missed you' grin on his face and we have a massive hug. We have fun when we do things together, even if it's boring tasks like DIY, but that's because we're usually half naked and it's hard not to have fun when you're half naked. ;)

So if you meet someone and they're not your type, maybe give them a chance. I could have so easily written my future husband off and gone in search of a bastard who would have eventually crushed my spirit, or someone who I thought looked like 'the one'. 

Who knows if I let go of potential good 'uns before him? It doesn't matter, because this time I bagged the one for me.

Some say love should be like a punch in the guts, with an attraction at first sight which makes your legs go giddy, but sometimes love creeps up on you like summer in April. It's when you realise you're a better person for knowing them, when you don't recognise the person you were before them, and you can't imagine a future without them. That's our kind of love.


Tell me how you met your partner if you have one. If you're single and ready to mingle, tell me what you look for in a person. Go go GO.

I love talking about all things love/attraction and may I just say, I'm totally including my gay, bi and lesbian readers in this. Love is love is LOVE and anyone who is not down with gay love/marriage can GTFO.

So that's that. Thanks for reading.


Wednesday, 22 January 2014

Velvet and lace OOTD

Hello loves,

I gave the Taking Shape Sing jacket a spin before with a casual vibe, but didn't think it did the jacket justice. I decided to wear it with the red lace dress which I wore in another outfit post last week. I think it was the idea of Sarah on my Facebook page to team velvet and lace. Inspired choice, thank you!


Jacket, Taking Shape*
Dress, New Look Inspire
Tights, Big Bloomers Company
Shoes, Very (past season.)
Earrings, gift from ma & pa in law
Necklace, Galibardy
Bracelet, clothes swap

I was having a bit of a tights malfunction as I was doing housework and things here and there in between larking about in front of the camera. Just after these photos were taken the crotch was down to my knees. So flattering! Nora Batty, eat your heart out. :)

What are your two dream materials to mix? I like rough and smooth, like silk and leather or the recessionista (and animal friendly) version - satin and pvc.

Thanks for reading.

Tuesday, 21 January 2014

Naked 3 and face spam

Hiya!

I've mentioned a couple of times recently I'm coming/have come out of a Fibromyalgia flare up. I've gone from getting out of bed a couple of hours after I wake up because I just can't face the day, starving myself until tea time and doing the very bare minimum around the house to being almost human. IT'S FANTASTIC!

The only downside is I now want to do all the things at once and have taken about 27000 photos this week of outfits and my face. ;)

LOOK 1
Demure make up and freshly henna'd hair. I showed eye close ups from this look here alongside Naked 3 palette swatches. I used Strange under my brows, Dust in my inner corners and along the bottom lash line, Buzz on the main part of my lid and Blackheart in the corners and smoked out. I also used:

Eyes
Primer - Too Faced Shadow Insurance Lemon Drop
Urban Decay Strange, Dust, Buzz and Blackheart from the Naked 3 palette
Liquid eyeliner - VIVO plum
Mascara - Soap & Glory Thick & Fast
Brows - Fashionista brow kit

Face
Fashionista Luminous foundation in Nude
Illamasqua concealer in CC115
Dainty Doll blusher 003 as contour
Famous Make up shimmer brick in Pink as blush/highlight

Lips
MUA Intense Kisses lip gloss in Kiss & Tell


The Fashionista foundation is the best colour foundation for my pale skin I've ever found. I'm going to stockpile it. The lip gloss by MUA is a pink based red which shows up pink with flash.

Here, have a bonus shot of my newly henna'd head, along with a stained scalp. The redder parts you see are the henna over grey hair. The greyer I get, the fiercer my hair will look. Awesome! The henna is really conditioning and makes my hair thicker and shinier for a week or so after application.


LOOK 2
Neutral eyes and a dark lip

This time I used Strange under my brows - it's a 'my skin but better' colour - and Factory with Trick over the top to make a browny gold shade but I don't think it shows up too well. I used Darkhorse in the crease and blended out. I actually think the bold lips need a vampier eye but there's always next time.

Hooded eyes and eyelashes that refuse to curl!

Eyes
Strange, Factory, Trick, Darkhorse from Urban Decay Naked 3 palette
Mascara - Soap & Glory Thick & Fast
Brows - Fashionista brow kit

Face
Fashionista Luminous foundation in Nude
Illamasqua concealer in CC115
Dainty Doll blusher 003 as contour
Famous Make up shimmer brick in Pink as blush/highlight

Lips
MUA Luxe velvet lip in Kooky

That's enough of my face for now, I'm sure!

Thanks for peeking.

Monday, 20 January 2014

Pink Clove wrap dress OOTD

Hello lovelies!

On Saturday hubby and I went to Bexhill, another sea side town. It was a grey, cold and windy day but we wanted some exercise. I became so unfit in the really long Fibromyalgia flare up I had. Now I need to get used to gentle exercise on flat stretches before I can take on the monster hills where we live.

I spotted a lovely beach shelter which I decided would be a good place to take photos.

I'm wearing a wrap dress from Pink Clove, with a black vest underneath as it's very booby. The dress is very loose fitting on me. I bought this dress in the sale and after they sent me the wrong size on the dress I ordered for Christmas, I bought a size 30/32 (to save having to send it back) and it's far too big. Thankfully it has an elasticated waist which saves it a bit, but at least now I know that I can wear a 26/28 in anything with stretch from Pink Clove. I didn't send it back because I couldn't be bothered, to be honest, and it might shrink in the tumble dryer anyway.

Dress, Pink Clove sale
Jacket, New Look sale
Leggings, Simply Be
Scarf, stall in town
Boots, Tesco (last year.)

What do you think about these outfit posts out and about? Do you like them?

Thanks for reading!

Sunday, 19 January 2014

FYFI (For Your Fucking Information)

Hello dears,

There are many trolls doing the rounds on social networking in Fatsville this week. Mama's gonna have a rant about people who are deliberately sour to others on the internet, thus onwards referred to as trolls, or other rude words. Go get a gin and some earplugs. P.S. This post is heavy on the caps lock. My bad. This is aimed at them, not your, kind readers.


Hello people fucknuts,

For your fucking information: you catch more flies with honey than you do with vinegar.

Being nice is so much better than being hateful but this is something which doesn't apply to certain corners of the internet. There are a number of people (in the loosest sense possible, I would assume) who seem to stalk the internet waiting for a person to be caught being all FAT in front of a camera, then locate and prime their shitty gene, crack their hairy knuckles and swot up on the insult and cliche dictionary before letting loose with some bile.

I get it, I get it. It's 5 weeks between paydays for most people and it's still so far away, we're all skint, and some of us are a bit fatter than we were on, ooh, Christmas Eve. The whole damn world is obsessed with dieting right now and we're all a bit grouchy. On top of that the weather's shit, the news is all doom and gloom, oh and did I mention everyone's skint?

Now you bilious keyboard warriors need something to do to pass the time till February, when the hopes of a Valentines Day bunk up and a few Cadbury's creme eggs will tide you over alongside a few daffodils sprouting and a bit of sunshine. What to do, what to do? Can't kick kittens any more, got told off by the RSPCA. Oh yes, let's hang out on Facebook pages and wait until they put a plus size blogger's photo up without asking or telling them.

Let's imagine a troll's day.

TROLLSDAY, JAN 2014

Wake up, shave troll toes. Could donate toe hair to make wigs for 14 bald people, such is daily regrowth, but no, am here to spread malice on this earth only.

Eat breakfast, a couple of small children.

Log on to the Trollternet. Scratch hairy arse. Sniff. Approve.

Limber up sausagey troll fingers. Whose day to ruin today? So many choices. Oh, so many fat people I could be horrible to. I don't know where to start! Mummy!

I know, let's pick on one who looks a bit confident. We can't have that, can we my precious? (Did I just liken trolls to Gollum? Well he lived in a cave too, so it seems fitting.) Oh, this one is wearing something a fat person shouldn't! They're not in a shapeless billowing black creation. How DARE they. How dare they LIKE themselves? We can't have this. Imagine the disorder if fat people actually start LIKING themselves. Sound the FATTY KLAXON! HIDE ALL THE CAKES!

I know, let's not make any comment on the CLOTHES they're wearing at all. I mean, it's not like these websites put photos up so people can look at and buy clothes, is it?! Don't be stupid! They do it for my entertainment! Right, let's tell this one she's a minger, infer she smells and tell her her very existence is the cause of the OMFG OBESITY EPI.....oh fuck, we trolls never were much good at spelling, grammar and all that other good stuff which help you get jobs.....EPI ...DEMMIK. There, that'll do. They'll still know they're fat, which is my job. I mean, they can't KNOW they're fat can they, or else they'd be hiding down a deep hole, like me, surely?

It's my job to tell people they look shit in clothes, so they take a long hard look in the mirror and cry, just like I do when I look at myself. It doesn't matter if they look great, I can't tell them that can I? I mean, they're all jumped up as it is, daring to stand in front of a camera. Just because they can stand in front of one without cracking the lens, not like me. It's not fair and everyone else has to pay for it! Everyone has to feel as shit about themselves as I do. C'mon, after all, the whole world revolves around me, you know? YOU KNOW?!

It's freedom of speech, innit? People fought wars and died so I could be an arsehole to people I don't know on the internet. I bet if my grandad wasn't a troll and had fought in a war he'd be proud of me. Look how far we've come. I mean years ago we used to fight wars to protect people and now we start wars on the internet.

So yeah fatty, don't go around being all happy with your friends and family who love you and think you're awesome just as you are. You have to be as miserable as me, covered in mud up to my troll monobrow, and all alone. It's not my fault I have a hideous personality and no one loves me. Nothing is my fault. I go around blaming everybody else for everything to make me feel better. Like Homer Simpson says, excuse me for having enormous flaws I don't work on! It's far easier for me to find fault in other people than it is look at myself. I mean, I'm such a knobflap making other people miserable gives me the only pleasure I have in life.

I think I'm done for the day. I might have made a few people cry. *proud face* Oh, I'm so tired after riling up so many people, I think I might snack on a few more small children and rest up for tomorrow's fat-baiting.

--------

Hi, it's me, Leah. I'm back again, I've exorcised that troll demon. Bleeurgh. Nasty breath. Jeez, get some Listerine, trolls.

Wait, what? I've just been rude about trolls? Hurt your troll feelings? OH NO. Imagine how horrible it must be for people who have that happen to them ALL THE DAMN TIME. Just for daring to exist.

"IT'S JUST THE INTERNET." 
"IT'S JUST MY OPINION."
"I'M JUST BEING HONEST."
"I'M EXERCISING FREEDOM OF SPEECH."
"DON'T GET WOUND UP."

Isn't that the kind of thing you say if someone dares answer you back?! Sorry, suck it! This shit goes both ways.

We do NOT have to be nice to you to prove we're 'better' people than you. You're actually better than you, the YOU you're being when you're a grade A cuntosaurus on the internet. When you look back on your greatest moments on your death bed do you think being a catty arsehole is going to be one of them?! Do you think your parents are proud of the person you are when you're going out of your way to spoil someone else's day?! THINK BEFORE YOU TYPE. TAKE OWNERSHIP OF YOURSELF. GROW UP. Don't think just because you're too uptight to wear tight, bangin' clothes fat people shouldn't either. We OWN that shit. And if you're a fat woman on the internet going round telling other fat women what they should and shouldn't wear, you could do a lot worse than read some of the blogs of the women you're bitching about. You might learn something, like how to love yourself, and then others.

Stop thinking you rule the world, you pocket despots.

Thanks for reading. Now pass me the gin.

Saturday, 18 January 2014

Blog mission statement for 2014

Hello pickles.

I've been thinking since New Year about what I want to do on/for/with the blog this year. Because of my mental health I don't want to put too much pressure in by giving myself direct targets as such. I want to gently grow the blog, but only at the rate that I can get to know everyone as they come along. I don't want numbers for the sake of them.

I've come up with a kind of mission statement about things to do with the blog this year.

1. Do a nail of the day and face of the day post once a week. Because I've been in months of Fibromyalgia flare up I've neglected the beauty side of things, but I'm coming out of it now (phew!) and also the light is getting better so it means I can do more things. All the things!

2. Get through my enormous 'to swatch' pile, which is really shameful in size, and show you the goodies.

3. Get some umbrella type lights for taking better blog photos. We have dodgy light for about half the year in the UK so it's well worth making an investment so I can bring better photos to the blog all year round.

4. Do more outfit photos outside, because they look 1000 times better than ones taken indoors.

5. Get a new camera with auto focus on the video so I can do regular videos for the blog. (It sounds really petty but at the moment because our camera doesn't have auto focus on the video I have to get hubs to set me up recording or else the whole thing is out of focus. It's a massive ball ache because he's never ready when I am, meh.) I REALLY want to do videos to talk about Love EVERY Body (and for other things like make up.) I want to lay out my ideas for the monthly assignments on video each month as it's so much easier to impart meanings to words when you can see the hand gestures and facial expressions to go with them. Words on a screen can only do so much.

I need to raise almost £600 for the camera bundle I want (this massive bundle is as much money as some places are charging for the camera alone!) and will be thinking about how I can raise money towards it, be it offering blog advertising or taking on more sponsored posts (as long as they're in keeping with the blog.) Orrrr winning the lotto, or offering 100 of you sexual favours if you give me a donation of £6 each, hahaha. (They'll be very small sexual favours for £6!) Or selling my kidney. Does anyone want a kidney?! No? :)

Seriously, any suggestions for ways to raise money legally and quickly would be wonderful. I want to avoid getting it on credit, but am dying to get cracking with videos to explain the thoughts behind Love EVERY Body every month. It's my birthday in 3 months so if I'm lucky I'll get some money to put towards a new camera. Every little helps, as they say!

6. Take on more guest posts, especially from the Love EVERY Body participants family.

7. Spread the body positivity message far and wide, even if I have to stand on a chair and yell. ;)

8. Meet more of my fellow bloggers and blog readers, too.

9. I want to dig out buried treasure from the back of my wardrobe and chests of drawers to make 'new' outfits out of old, with ideas about how to inject some life into those older items. It's silly to have a ton of clothes and not wear them because they're not new, yet I do feel a pressure (possibly self made) to have loads of shiny new things. I also want to accessorise more. I'm really quite rubbish at accessorising considering I have tons of jewellery, hats, scarves & gloves.

10. It sounds really cheesy, but I want my blog to be the kind of place where someone can come when they're having a shit day and find a bit of solace. You know me, I'm just a big ol' hippy who wants everyone to feel the luuuurve, maaan. ;) I know some of the people doing Love EVERY Body have started following each other's blogs and I'm so happy about them making friends with each other like that. All I had in mind when I started LEB was trying to make people happier with themselves just as they are, and seeing a little community coming together is wonderful. It happens rarely, but when I see one of my readers talking to another reader in the comments on my blog I have a little 'YES!!!' moment and I like to think if someone was having a crappy day and said so in a comment on my blog* that other people might jump in and offer them a virtual hug as well. I used to go to a pub which had a sign outside which said something about there being no strangers inside, just friends you haven't yet met and if we can cultivate that vibe on my blog, I think I'll be as proud as punch.

*By all means, if you're having a crappy day feel free to make contact - say so a blog comment, even if it has sod all to do with my post. Or email me, as some of you already do.

Ooh, I've just had another idea.

11. If you have a problem you can't sort out or need answers to (I sound like the A-Team!) you could email me and I could make it a blog post (keeping your name totally anonymous of course) and post them like an 'agony aunt' format so myself and other readers can come up with suggestions to help. Sometimes I think it helps just to put a problem out there, to be heard. You might need tips about what to wear for an upcoming event, advice on how to deal with critical family members/colleagues, or anything else at all. If the questions come, then I'll post them and we can all offer advice/support. Let me know what you think.

What are your plans for this year, if you blog?

Readers, what do you want out of 2014? What do you think about my mission statement? What kind of posts/videos would to like me to do? And do you know anyone who wants to buy a kidney?! ;)

Thanks for reading.

Friday, 17 January 2014

Naked 3 palette swatches and look

Hello pickles!

I've had a bit of a play around with the Urban Decay Naked 3 palette now and have done a couple of looks, one of which I'll post here alongside some swatches. It's the rose-colour themed neutral palette.


I also did fingertip swatches and thought I'd include them to show how fragile some of the shadows are - particularly Dust (apt name) and Factory.


Here are some blurry shots to show the sparkles.

I don't remember the Naked 1 palette shadows being as soft as a couple of these are. Nevertheless they're pretty shades. I used Strange under my brows, Dust in my inner corners and along the bottom lash line, Buzz on the main part of my lid and Blackheart in the corners and smoked out.


A little fun fact about that scar near my eye. When I was a toddler, our back garden was accessed by a step up out of the kitchen. The outside of our house had been newly pebble-dashed and there were lots of stones everywhere. I toppled over and hit my head on the step, where a piece of broken stone was, and it went in my face. Ow. It's one of my earliest memories.

As to the palette, I haven't had enough time to play with it to form a concrete opinion yet. Once I've used all the colours I'll be able to tell. I think it's going to grow on me. I did expect a bit more pinkness for a palette touted as being rose-based one but the pinkest tones like Dust and Buzz are very flattering for my skin tone and eye colour.

I have more photos of this day's make up look but I'm going to post them separately with a run down of items used or else this'll be such a long post.

It's £37 when you can find one - keep trying House of Fraser and Debenhams to see if they get stock back in. It comes with a double ended brush and 4 resealable Primer Potion samples.

Thanks for reading.

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