When James and I met, we were in a famous London rock bar full of gorgeous ladies, but it was me who drew his gaze because I was smiling lots and throwing my head back with laughter having a bloody ball.
I used to have a BIG problem having a good time. To put it bluntly, I had a rod up my arse! I used to think people would stare or say something if I did the things I wanted to do. My nan died in 1998 and I had somewhat of an epiphany. I realised life is too short to worry about what other people think about you.
I've since realised that not doing something because you worry what people think and feeling crap about it is a LOT worse than just going for it. People are so drawn to confidence, even more so than looks I'd say.
With regards to body image, we ALL have bits of us we don't like. For us larger ladies, we might have more worries than other girls, as we have size to deal with, as well as shape. All we have to do is concentrate on our good bits. Men tend to see the big picture (pardon the pun!), tending to not focus on the things we might. Hate your tum? (I hate mine at times) but have great teeth? Grin like a Cheshire cat! I take great pride in my hair and get a Toni N Guy hairdresser to attend to my locks. Great tits? Work it, as Gok would say! Got gorgeous creamy skin? Look after it. Got beautiful eyes? Show them off. Maximise all your good bits, and don't fret over your perceived 'bad' bits. And remember, just because we might not like something about ourselves, it doesn't mean others think the same. You might hate your dimply knees but someone else might think they're the cutest thing they've ever seen.
If you've totally lost sight of your good bits, ask your good friends what they think your best qualities are. You might be pleasantly surprised! (If you're not, you might need new friends!)
I feel my best when my hair is clean and shiny, I've got my favourite perfume on, my nails and make up are looking great and I have an outfit on which looks good and is comfortable. Then I'm ready to go out and have fun. I might have the fattest arse on anyone wherever I'm going, but I'm the best me I can be at that moment, so I'm happy.
Also take pride in your non-physical attributes. I swear some physically-gifted people never have to cultivate a personality. I know I'm funny, witty and intelligent. Why wouldn't someone want to hang out with me? Why wouldn't a gorgeous guy want to be with me?!
And on those inevitable hormonal days when I feel horrible, I look at pictures of other plus sized ladies and remind myself how beautiful we are!
Go and make friends with that mirror NOW!
What makes you feel your best?
Thanks for reading.