Reasons to be happy

I've been doing a lot of work on my mental health recently and one of the things I've been doing is concentrating on the things that make me happy, so I thought I would share some of them with you.

1. Becoming National Trust members.
James and I have got a joint membership and I can't wait to explore lots of places. I love being outdoors in spring, summer and autumn so I'm so excited. We went to Scotney Castle on Saturday, where the photo above was taken.

The third time's the charm feat. Elvi

Any link with *AL written after it within this post is an affiliate link, which means if you click and buy from it I will earn a small commission.
Let me let you into a little secret - the first time I wear a new item of clothing I rarely hit the jackpot in the outfit stakes. When I get something new I'm usually so excited to wear it that I take photos of it and blog them right away. I later regret that because when I wear a new item a second or third time I really get a feel for how to style it and the outfit comes out much better. So, I've been holding off blogging looks that didn't work out too well until I get it right. This is my third attempt at this wearing this skirt and finally I'm happy with how everything came out. Unfortunately because I waited so long this skirt it's now out of stock on Elvi (and it's not on ASOS or Navabi either) so keep your eyes peeled for it on eBay if you like the look of it. For reference I'm wearing a size 26 and it's VERY oversized, you could get me in it twice, so don't be afraid to try a smaller size than usual if you find it somewhere. If you've never worn Elvi before the quality is always fantastic, and although at a higher price point there are often bargains to be had if you're patient. This skirt is a heavyweight fabric which washes brilliantly and feels great on. It's my favourite skirt at the moment. I'd buy it in 5 different colours if I could.

I saw this skirt on Danie Vanier a while back and fell in love with it. That woman could wear an old potato sack and still look like the most ravishing woman to ever walk the face of the earth.

I'm wearing:
Necktie, from the skirt
Boyfriend tee, Simply Be (from a twin pack of black/grey) *AL
Skirt, Elvi  *AL - check out some of their other pleated skirts here
Hi tops, Everything 5 Pounds *AL
Bag and earrings, Primark

About web content scrapers and why every blogger needs to be aware of them


As some of you may know, my blog content was ripped off recently by web content scrapers but what does that actually mean and why is it bad for your blog?


Content scraping is when an individual takes content from many other sites, collates it and publishes it to their own site as if it's their work. It's theft of original works and it can negatively affect the SEO of the site it was stolen from. Many sites are made up of works entirely stolen - scraped - from other people. There are a lot of content scrapers out there -  this is the second time it's happened to me. Scrapers may steal a few of your articles, or they might copy your whole damn website.

This is what an example of what a scraped website looks like. This was the site of the last person to scrape my content. As you can see it has content from several different people, but nowhere on the site does it LINK to the people whose work it has stolen.

Pink and khaki, it's officially a thing

Any link with *AL written after it within this post is an affiliate link, which means if you click and buy from it I will earn a small commission.

If you follow me on Instagram you'll have seen this outfit a while back, as I always preview things on there first. Talking of Instagram, I've been banned from posting/commenting/liking/replying/making stories on there as their algorithm as picked me up as a spammer. I'm waiting for an actual human to respond to my report, but I won't be holding my breath for a swift outcome with the weekend an' all. I think happened because I thanked 3 people for comments they'd made on a photo of me, but because I don't follow them, Instagram thinks I'm one of those annoying spambots who tag loads of people in comments. It's a massive pain in the arse, but c'est la vie!

Moving on, part of my fashion manifesto for this year was using colour in new ways - both harmoniously and in jarring ways. Pink and khaki was a match I didn't expect to like, but I really love it. This was a minimal makeup day and a chilled outfit as we were only popping out to Primark to get James a new belt, but I bought a new bag while I was there and wanted to show it off straight away.

I've decided to start putting the outfit details in the main body of my text (before I do the 'read more' section) as in my reader survey about 1/4 of you said you were bothered about not being able to read in one chunk. At least this way if it's outfit details you're after, you'll get to them quickly. I aim to please. 😜

I'm wearing:
Jacket, past season Boohoo
Top (under dress) H&M+ £8.99 *AL
Dress, local shop (hacked from a 3/4 length playsuit)
Tights, Big Tights Company 90 denier (currently out of stock)
Trainers, Evans £28 *AL
Bag, Primark (in store only)

At this moment #1 | Lifestyle

at-this-moment-lifestyle //


A few days ago I started watching Shooter, the Netflix series starring Ryan Phillippe. It's about an ex-Marine who was set up for murder. I was expecting it to be a propaganda-fest in the usual 'Murica the greatest nation in the world style, as often happens when American patriotism, guns and TV commingle. I found it really immersive from the first episode, which was nice as the point of watching TV for me is not having to think about the day to day stuff. If I'm thinking about my laundry pile or the washing up the show really doesn't cut it. I think I'm about 6 or 7 episodes into the first series, and I really like it. I didn't see the attraction to Ryan Phillippe back in the day when he was younger - he was far too pretty for me - but he's matured nicely and he has a beard now, so there's that. 😍

Fat Girl Casual

Any link with *AL written after it within this post is an affiliate link, which means if you click and buy from it I will earn a small commission.
I've been playing around with looks, splicing dressy things with casual things. I've a new-found love for casual wear that I've never had before, and it's because as a fat person I've had to PERFORM high femininity at all times. Fat girls don't get to hang out in sweats with messy unwashed hair in a bun and get called cute. People think we're lazy slobs who look like that all the time. So I've spent a looooong time avoiding wearing anything casual to avoid The Judgement™. Well fuck that shit because I'll soon be 43 and I'll wear what the fuck I want. I didn't even realise until recently that my avoidance of casual wear was a thing. It's weird to be socialised to behave in certain ways and not even realise it until one day BOOM - epiphany. So I'm messing around with femme + casual wear to get the feel for it before I jump into full-on casual wear with both feet.

My Fertility Story part 2 - my first ectopic pregnancy

[If you're reading by RSS/email, please note my feed has been shortened to discourage theft of my blog posts. Click through to the blog to read the whole post].

It goes without saying but TW: child loss.

Only after I started writing this did I realise how much a toll bringing it all up would take, but like they say on Mastermind, I've started so I'll finish. I've had it better than some and worse than others, but everything I've been through has made me a stronger person. Here's the story of my first ectopic pregnancy. It happened 14 years ago but I'll recall it as best I can.

But first, what are ectopic pregnancies? From the Ectopic Pregnancy Trust: Ectopic pregnancy is a common, occasionally life-threatening condition that affects 1 in 80 pregnancies. Put very simply, it means “an out-of-place pregnancy”. It occurs when a woman’s ovum (egg), that has been fertilised, implants (gets stuck) outside the womb. The most common place for an ectopic pregnancy is the Fallopian tube but there are many other sites where an ectopic pregnancy can be located. It is, sadly, not possible to move an ectopic pregnancy into the womb to allow it to grow normally.

A Wednesday (Addams) state of mind

Any link with *AL written after it within this post is an affiliate link, which means if you click and buy from it I will earn a small commission.
FAT WEDNESDAY ADDAMS GOTH OUTFIT // WWW.XLOVELEAHX.CO.UK Well I had lost my outfit mojo but I've found it again. This is one of those outfits which came about in a flash. I had to go to the post office and some other errands and my hair was greasy so I needed to do something quick. Buns or plaits? Once I'd plumped for plaits the rest of the outfit came to me. It was well overdue I got my goth on again as I've been wearing a lot of 'pretty' outfits recently.

I dress so seasonally - when it's cold and grey I need colour in my life to keep the misery at bay. But once the world comes alive again in spring I can haul out all the dark shades because life has enough colour without me having to add to it. I've tried to mix up the textures a bit to add interest to an almost all black outfit, but the light was fading a little so it may not be clear that I'm wearing leather look leggings.

Mustard and rust


As well as my ongoing fascination with pink and grey at the moment, I've also got a yen for earthy colours like rust, mustard and dark greens. Here's a very simple (and inexpensive!) outfit I wore recently which cheered me up with its burst of colour.

Current fave colour palette - pink and grey

Hello lovelies! I'm in a proper funk with regards to outfits at the moment. I can't put my finger on what it is exactly, but I keep finding fault with everything I put together. I've deleted about 6 whole sets of photos in the last month. Waaahhh. I'm loving colour at the moment, especially pink and grey together, so let's focus on happy things. 😊 Spring is just around the corner, so there's a lot to look forward to.

James and I went to some local woods to take these photos and there were so many people coming past. I was feeling very grumpy about interrupting my posing mid-flow until I realised all of them had dogs. It's worth being constantly stopped in my tracks to say hello to inquisitive doggies. I'm less keen on meeting their people, though. 😉

Life lately


Hello lovelies! I thought I'd do a catch up post as I have a few things going on.

It's been a rough month or so for me but hopefully things will be much sunnier soon. Many of you will know that I really struggle with life in the dark months, and that's been especially true recently. Everything has been an effort, even the most simple things like self care. I've been living out of my bed. I've been spending at least 12 hours a day asleep, trying to sleep or trying to find the strength to get out of bed. I've been having really bad troubles with my sleep recently - taking hours to get to sleep, waking up multiple times in the night, never sleeping through a whole night. I've had all kinds of things going on on top of that - a lot more gynae issues than usual, far heavier periods and a lot more ovary pain. Well, I had a routine blood test last week (just in time!) and it turns out my thyroid has gotten worse and they've had to increase my medication. This happened a few days ago and I should hopefully start to feel the benefit soon. Your thyroid controls the behaviour of every cell in your body. It affects how you process food for energy, your hunger/satiety levels, how you sleep, your mental health and even your periods. No wonder I was struggling, but better days are coming!

Another thing that's been happening is I've had a lot of my blog posts stolen/borrowed by another site (depending which way you look at it).

My Fertility Story - Part 1

I've heard it said before that bloggers shouldn't share too much of their personal lives, but I think that's complete bollocks. Yes, people might come to my page for the outfits, but how you connect with people is through sharing stories of your life. I have a lot of stories in me and I want to tell them - I have a burning desire to do so at the moment. Sometimes I'm obsessed with doing outfit posts, sometimes it's makeup, but at the moment it's opening up my heart.

This series will talk about my reproductive health in general, my two ectopic pregnancies, the reproductive health issues I've had since I had my fallopian tube removed, and also the decision for James to have a vasectomy, thus making us a childless couple. This is quite a lot to tell, so I'm going to break it up into at least a few parts. These posts will obviously deal with child loss, so please don't read these posts if they'll upset you.

When plus size models aren't plus enough

I've recently become a contributing writer to Indie Plus Design, whose purpose is: Independent Plus Size Bloggers and Designers promoting innovation in fashion and journalism. Expect articles about the fashion industry, blind product reviews where the tester only finds out who made the garment after they've shared their opinion, and interviews with independent designers.

My first article for Indie Plus Design

When I first heard that a lot of plus size models pad their bodies to fit the clothing they model many words sprang to mind but most of them are far too rude to share here. As a UK size 28 woman my thoughts on plus size models are already complicated. It’s galling that clothes sold by retailers for women up to UK size 32+ are modelled on someone who’s at most a size 18. Discovering that these size 18 women are actually size 12-14 and padded out to resemble an impossible standard is even more of a smack in the teeth. So common is the practice in the fashion industry well known plus models such as Iskra Lawrence are open about the practice of packing shapewear shorts with 1.5 inch thick foam pads which widen the hips and round the buttocks, and using chicken fillet bra pads to enlarge the breasts.


[Image source: Refinery 29]