Saturday, 31 October 2015

Treats for your nails from Nailpolish.co.uk*

Hiya!

I have some lovely Autumnal nail polish shades to show you from nailpolish.co.uk today.

Nailpolish.co.uk also sent me some bonus nail tools and stamping equipment so I could take care of my nails and do some nail art, and you can see what I did with the stamps at the end of the post.

Not only Nailpolish.co.uk they have over 1000 nail polish colours in stock at any time and over 100 treatments, but they also do next day delivery if you order before 2pm Monday-Friday. Prices start at £2.99 and they have brands such as OPI, China Glaze, Essie, Orly and Sally Hansen, with more brands coming on board all the time. There's free express tracked delivery on every order over £15 and my parcel came securely packed in a box. They sell only genuine products direct from the big brands themselves so you don't have to worry.

NAILPOLISH.CO.UK NAIL POLISH SWATCHES

I picked out 3 lovely Autumnal colours from OPI, who are one of my favourite nail polish brands. L-R: A-Piers To Be Tan, Sprung and Muir Muir On The Wall. A-Piers To Be Tan is just what it says, a lovely tan which goes on smoothly and totally opaque in 2 coats. Sprung is a gorgeous golden orange glitter polish which is stunning on it's own in 2-3 coats or over A-Piers To Be Tan, and Muir Muir On The Wall is one a pretty duochrome, made up of plum and gold, which is opaque in 2 coats.

NAILPOLISH.CO.UK NEXT DAY DELIVERY

I'm wearing:
Thumb - 2 coats A-Piers To Be Tan
Index finger - 3 coasts Sprung
Middle finger - 2 coats Muir Muir On The Wall
Ring finger - 1 coat A-Piers To Be Tan and 1 coat Sprung
Little finger - 2 coats A-Piers To Be Tan

NAILPOLISH.CO.UK OPI ORLY BARRY M CHINA GLAZE SALLY HANSEN CND ESSIE

I did some nail art using the polishes and the MoYou stamping set, which was really easy to use. I'm using Muir Muir On The Wall as a base, Sprung over my thumb nail and A-Piers To Be Tan on the other 4 nails.

NAILPOLISH.CO.UK OPI ORLY BARRY M CHINA GLAZE SALLY HANSEN CND ESSIE

Shop nailpolish.co.uk. I've just noticed they've added Barry M to the site too. I'm going in! Send a search and rescue party if I'm not back in a week. ;)

Leah xoxo

*This post contains items which were gifted for review.

Friday, 30 October 2015

Outfit | Big fat pumpkin

Hiya pumpkins!

I had so many Halloween outfits planned but because SAD is kicking my butt and I'm sleeping so much I'm not seeing a whole lot of daylight to take photos.

Here's one I did manage to do.


I bought this t shirt very cheaply from eBay. It's a Fruit of the Loom shirt, which surprised me because it was so cheap. The print will wear off over time, but it'll probably look even cooler then.

The leaves in the background are the ones I mentioned my Autumn Lusts post. I gave some to my mum and my aunt as well. It came with 10 lengths, and I used 3 here. I've saved one to make a hair accessory with.




I'm wearing:

Hair flower, Off With Her Head Millinery
Earrings, present from Mookie
Pumpkin t shirt, eBay
Skirt, past season New Look Inspire
Shoes, past Everything 5 Pounds

What are you doing for Halloween? I was going to a zombie walk but I need to rest my knee. Have a great weekend.

Leah xoxo

Life | What's new with me

Hiya loves!

I need to get back in the habit of doing my Friday Youtube video but I've either been too busy or felt too low, so here's a wordy catch up.

Knee injury

I injured my knee on Sunday and it's been a few days of doing very little at all to help it heal, but I think it's getting there now. I have a history of knee problems after a work-related accident 20 years ago. I got impaled on a 6 inch bolt which went into my knee, which made my leg shrink. This other leg has carried more of it's fair share of weight for 2 decades because of that and occasionally plays up. It last did it about 5 years ago but it's worse this time - so stiff and there's very little range of movement - but it IS getting better.

Change of focus

I feel like turning over a new leaf and I'm gagging to get cracking as soon as my knee is better. I have a yen to focus a bit more on alternative looks as that's what really makes me happy, so I intend to have a clear out of a lot of clothes which don't fit into that aesthetic. Plus I'm watching the Coven series of American Horror Story at the moment and am really craving all black witchy style everything.

Christmas

I've been buying up stocking fillers like no one's business (as my bank account attests - ouch!) and the spare room is being taken over with stuff. I wasn't in the mood for Christmas at all last year and swore to myself that I'd do all gift vouchers this year but have I hell! I am scaling back Christmas spending though as James and I have started looking at flats for sale. We're saving up towards a deposit and his parents will help us out a little with that but we have to be really careful with money. No, scratch that - I have to be really careful with money! This is another reason why clearing out my wardrobes appeals - I need the money from selling things and I like the idea of a capsule wardrobe in future - lots of black and white - where most things go with each other and can be jazzed up with accessories and my favourite strange coloured lipsticks. That will be a money saving move AND a space saving mood too. This year will be a far less materialistic Christmas so we can get our saving going.

These cuties

Look at these sweet things from Little Pink Kokoro.


They're brooches. Aren't they adorable? They're too good just for Halloween. I'll wear them all year round.

What's new with you? Are you doing anything for Halloween?

Leah xoxo

Thursday, 29 October 2015

Outfit | Interrobang holographic circle skirt

Hello munchkins,

A month or so ago I decided to buy my first Interrobang Art skirt. I've followed Christina on Instagram for many months and have lusted over many of her skirts. Hearing the holographic skirt was soon to be discontinued lit a fire under me. Christina does skirts in sizes 6-36 in most items (and in dual sizes of S (UK 6-10), M (12-16), L (18-22), XL (24-28) and XXL (30-34) in other styles) and is based in the UK.

All Christina's skirts are handmade so take a few weeks to arrive, but it's well worth the wait. Since I've rediscovered my alternative roots I'm keen to support independent sellers and buy less high street fashion. I don't feel embraced into the bosom of most major plus size retailers who often body shame other body types or assume I want to minimise areas of my body like they're abhorrent. I'd like my fashion without a side order of bullshit, thanks very much. If I can buy rarer items and stand out from the pack AND help support independent businesses I'll be very happy.

INTERROBANG ART PLUS SIZE HOLOGRAPHIC CIRCLE SKIRT ALTERNATIVE UNICORN

I feel like I've found my groove again with regards to outfits. Being alternative is my bag entirely, and I'll endeavour to inject more me into every outfit, even if it's only my shocking taste in strange lipsticks. ;)

PLUS SIZE ALTERNATIVE HOLOGRAPHIC SKIRT

PLUS SIZE HOLOGRAPHIC SKIRT FROM INTERROBANG UK ETSY SELLER ALTERNATIVE FASHION

PLUS SIZE SILVER HOLOGRAPHIC CIRCLE SKIRT INDEPENDENT ETSY SELLER

I'm wearing:

Petrol hair bow, Crown and Glory
Pentagram necklace, past season Boohoo
Sleeveless biker, past season New Look Inspire
Glitter top, Dorothy Perkins via Mookie - size 18. TRY EVERYTHING ON.
Holographic circle skirt, Interrobang £35
Shoes, past season R Price

As to fit of the skirt, I'm wearing a size 28 and it's very generously sized. It has an elasticated waist and I would size down next time for a snug fit. As to length, it's fine at the front but a little short for comfort at the back because of my bubble butt, which does mean I lose precious length on skirts and dresses. Luckily for me Interrobang does midi length skirts so my next purchase will be one of those and then my modesty will be assured. (I do have some......now where did I leave it?!) I'm SO pleased to have a holographic skirt that the length at the back is no issue at all, but I must bring it up to inform my fellow beauts with a bounteous behind. A pair of white cropped leggings underneath on a windy day would protect the public's eyes from viewing the next day's washing. ;)

Thanks for reading,
Leah xoxo

P.S. Do you remember my lofty ambitions to make my fortune through advertising and such like on my blog? A couple of months on I checked my affiliate marketing balance for sidebar ads. How will I spend all this filthy lucre? I have accumulated the massive sum of 64 pence. Will any of those people who stopped reading and lost respect for me because I admitted I wanted to make money from my blog *GASP* ever read again? Oh, I don't know.

Wednesday, 28 October 2015

The Ex Files

TW: Domestic abuse (past)

When I was a teen brought up on gushing romance novels and the 'If he likes you he's horrible to you' school of thought, I mistakenly thought I wanted someone to possess me jealously, if only so I could rebel and show how free I actually was. I think even at that tender age some part of me sensed that freedom tasted all the sweeter after a time of incarceration. What is any lived experience without context? I can say that in hindsight.

When I was a little older and had been with my first boyfriend for some time, I realised how vile it actually is to be someone's chattel. When someone sees you as a possession rather than a person, it leads to a situation where they expect a behaviour of you, and a different set of rules apply to them, probably because they see themselves as in a different class. Predator and prey, perhaps? No, very few people would be that honest with themselves. There were good times and bad times, but he grew up in an old fashioned family where men did what they wanted and women didn't ask questions. Where men 'looked after you' financially and neglected you emotionally, and you were to put up with it.

I didn't like that. I asked questions. Lots of them. I ended it because he was a liar and a cheat and a gaslighter who made me truly miserable in the end, and that wiped out a lot of the good he did. Times were different then. I certainly was. If I saw him in the street I'd say hello - not out of any huge fondness for him (some remains naturally, first love and all, but I don't particularly have any huge fondness for myself back then, either) - but because I'm in a better place and it feels good. Without knowing it at the time, he was my first 'This is what I do not want.' Sometimes you need lots of those before you find out what you do want.

When I was 21 and in my next relationship, I learned what it was to be managed and controlled in a charming way. I was young, naive and out of my first long term relationship, and ripe for the attentions of a master craftsman. Or craftswoman, more to the point, as she was, and her craft was her words. She could charm the birds from the trees. I knew I was being handled, but somehow it was bearable. To a point of course, and there's only so much excitement (read: unreliability) even a young girl who's finding her way in the world can stand. She was my second 'I do not want.'

So that was jealousy, lies, cheating, unreliability and being smarmed/charmed ticked off the list.

A year or so after that I embarked on a relationship which would turn out to be physically abusive. I always knew I didn't feel for him as he felt for me, and perhaps that was half the problem. There was never love or lust on my part, and I shouldn't have embarked on a relationship with him. It was a mistake which took 3 years to end. I claim ownership to his hurt feelings, but not the violence. That was all on him, his choice. There are plenty of other ways to deal with hurt feelings. It wasn't all bad, but then no relationship is. He looked after me when I needed it, but he was also a weak man who tried to drown me and strangle me, amongst other things. I lived with him and I was worried about being homeless so I stayed. It's amazing the things you can rationalise to yourself when you feel you have no choice. It was the attempt at killing me which was the death knell, if you'll excuse the pun. That was an evening of kicks and punches thrown, nothing too serious, as what would people say if I had bruises on my face? But then something came undone in him. After escaping from his tightening hands around my neck as I laid in bed I stood up and punched him in the face. That was the first time I stopped being worried about what he'd do to me and worried about what I'd do to HIM if he didn't stop. It was truly terrifying, more so than his violence. In that instant I could see why women killed men in these situations. It was me or him and thankfully he backed down. Any feelings whatsoever died in me as he loomed above me like a maniac that night. It was a cocktail of 50% pity and 50% sheer hate I felt for him afterwards. I couldn't wait to get away.

Change of job, change of town, and a definite change of life. I felt free again, and I started to have fun. I dated a lot, drawing from the rich dating pool that is London night life, and I bounced from one daft dalliance to another liking less and less of men and my poor judgement with (almost) every one. After a particularly nasty mistake of my own making I found myself at my lowest point ever and I swore off relationships for 2 years and put some work into ME. What made me happy. What I didn't want, aided by my long list of past relationships, two-weekers and one night stands. Every one a lesson, some pleasurable, some not so much. ;)

Sometime after that I was hanging out in my favourite London pub when a tiny pale bloke with long hair who was a friend of a friend asked to borrow a hair band, of all the ways to strike up a conversation. I hadn't been waiting to meet someone, far from it. I'd been learning how to enjoy being alone, which I think is something we all can benefit from. Somehow all my dodgy judgements and interesting (ahem) life experience pointed me towards this quiet bloke, who after 3 weeks caused me to have a serious chat to myself. He was just too nice. I'd eat him alive, wreck his feelings, and did I even deserve a nice bloke? I decided I did, and here we are, 12 and a half years later. His face more familiar than my own. His patience of me unending. His dancing around in his pants to cheer me up always appreciated. He makes me want to be a better human. His unfailing optimism, support, and patience with my hoarding fashionista tendencies know no bounds. When it's right it doesn't have to be serenades and doves and red roses. When it's right it doesn't diminish you, or make you a possession, or make you feel less of a person than you'd be on your own. When it's right you don't have to question if it's right, and for that I have all my exes to thank.

I didn't know what I wanted, but I knew what I didn't want, and that can point you in the right direction just as well as a compass.

If you are in an abusive relationship (mentally or physically) please know YOU are not at fault. You deserve better. You are worthy and loveable and please, please seek help. If someone is trying to isolate you from friends and family, if someone tells you you're worthless or an idiot, please get out as soon as you can.

SOURCE


Refuge UK
Samaritans UK
Women's Aid UK

List of domestic violence charities in the US
List of domestic violence charities worldwide



------------

It's not very often that I get the urge to write for the sake of writing, but this is what happened tonight.

Thanks for reading,
Leah xoxo

Sunday, 25 October 2015

Outfit | Ghost bones

Hello you.

I love Halloween because of all the spooky things for sale at this time of year. I'd be quite happy if Halloween was all year with a 2 week break for Christmas! I'm wearing a Halloween t shirt from New Look and some PJ bottoms from ASOS Curve today.

Plus size black and white Halloween outfit
I hope to see lots of Halloween stuff reduced after Saturday. :)

Plus size skeleton t shirt

Plus size ghost leggings

Plus size skeleton and ghost outfit
And once again, here's a shot of my bum. I'm having quite the love affair with my bum lately.

I'm wearing:

Skeleton t shirt, New Look
ASOS Curve Halloween PJs - now sold out (I'm wearing a size 26)
Shoes, past season R Price

The leggings aren't great quality - the ghosts aren't woven into the fabric but printed on top of it, which means they'll crack and disintegrate in time, but cute ghost leggings! Squeee. And they're SO comfortable.

I have a few more Halloween outfits to come but I'd better pull my finger out - it's almost here! Are you doing anything for Halloween?

Thanks for reading!
Leah xoxo

Friday, 23 October 2015

Outfit | Oxblood leopard

Hello loves!

I have terrible resting bitch face in these photos. I love my fellow fashion bloggers who stare at the camera commanding attention, but if I don't smile in my photos I think I look murderous. It's just my face.


Those redder bits at the front are the henna over my greys
Carrying on with my ethos of being truer to my rockin' style, here's another outfit which makes me smile......even if I'm not smiling in these photos. ;) This outfit is another reminder to try things on - the skirt is a size 20. My mum's got the same one! We bought them in Asda Weymouth a few years ago when we went on holiday together.



This top is really thin, but I don't mind as it's lightweight and ideal for layering a cardi over when the weather gets colder. It's only £7.99 as well.



I'm wearing:

Cross t-shirt, New Look Inspire
Leopard print skirt, past season George at Asda
Pointed flats, Matalan (now sold out)
Bracelets, old Primark/eBay

Talking of my mum, she and my step dad are coming to visit for a few days from today. He's been discharged from hospital and is (as far as we know) completely cancer free, although until he's 5 years clear we can only say he's in remission. He's very tired and all his hair has gone, but he's recovering slowly from the onslaught of chemo. We have a nice lazy weekend planned so he can rest up, and as my mum's still recovering from her fall and has limited mobility she'll appreciate the rest too. I'll see you on the other side of the weekend. Have a good one!

Thanks for reading,
Leah xoxo

Thursday, 22 October 2015

Current favourites

Hello!

Here are some of the things I'm loving right now.

CURRENT FAVES BARRY M CHINA GLAZE SIMPLE MAKEUP REVOLUTION

Here's what I'm loving this week.


Simple micellar water £4.49

I've tried Bioderma micellar water and B micellar water from Superdrug and I far prefer this one. The Bioderma one smelled strangely metallic and stung like the devil if I got it near my eyes. The B one from Superdrug was great but left my face feeling really sticky. This one by Simple is perfect for me - it doesn't smell, doesn't sting, and removes all but the most stubborn mascara. Micellar waters aren't a stand alone cleanser, but an additional cleansing step. For the low down on micellar waters, check out this great post by London Beauty Queen.

Makeup Revolution Hard Day palette £6

How do I love thee? Let me count the ways. This is my go to palette at the moment because I can do neutral or fierce looks with it, and I can even use the 2nd left matte shade as a contour shade as I'm so pale. This is so, so versatile and I'm using it virtually every day at the moment.I used this to do the fierce makeup I wore to the Bullet For My Valentine gig, too.

Barry M nail polish Countess

This is probably my favourite nail polish ever. It's just stunning. It's a glorious purple-brown with gorgeous sparkle. I'm wearing it in the photo above. It was released in Autumn 2013 and I didn't realise it was limited edition or I would've bought 10. I've just bought a back up from eBay.

Barry M nail polish Burgundy Crush £3.99

This matte burgundy shade is lovely, but it really needs a top coat as it chips so easily.

China Glaze nail polish I'm Not Lion

Oh pissflaps, this one looks like it was limited edition too. I can't find a link for you to buy it right now. (Note to self, make sure everything is current next time). It's a lovely silver and gold sparkly polish.

New Look brooch £4.99

I have a penchant for crosses of all kinds and as soon as I saw this I gasped. It's so gorgeous, and quite a good size too. Snap it up before it's too late!


I'm also watching the second series of American Horror Story and loving it, and I've been listening to a lot of While She Sleeps on Spotify after seeing them play on Saturday.What are you loving right now?

Thanks for reading,
Leah xoxo

Wednesday, 21 October 2015

Outfit | Feeling cute not critical

Hello lovelies,

I heard it said somewhere a long time ago that bloggers shouldn't post outfits on their blog that they wouldn't wear out of the house, but I say your blog, your rules. Hell, your life your rules, and if you don't blog then feel free to share selfies on social media when you feel cute. Snap some photos and put them out there whether you'd go out of the house dressed like that or not. Here are some photos of me feeling cute. :) Now I see the rounded belly, the big arse, and I choose to feel cute, not critical of myself.

You know, I can be self-critical with the best of them, but today I choose not to. It's refreshing to turn that nagging voice off mid-criticism. Our feelings about our bodies are often dependent on something happening....... 'I'll be happy when X happens.' We defer our happiness until some point in the future when we finally live up to that nagging voice in our head. Why not strive to love yourself now? Whether you're happy with your body or not, just realise you deserve happiness and all good things as much as anyone else does. Your worth does not and should not depend on what you look like. Even if you are aiming to transform your body in some way, starting off from a point of love is the best way, because when you love yourself, you treat yourself better. You deserve to treat yourself kindly.

The story of how I got to be confident goes like this: I realised that society's rules about who 'gets' to be valued are a crock of shit. If you read the average newspaper or magazine you quickly realise that unless you're uber thin and so young you're trailing afterbirth the media is incredibly cruel. It's incredibly cruel to women in particular, but particularly older women and women they see as outside the realm of attractiveness - like fat women. Actually, not even just fat women. Perfectly 'normal' women who aren't a size 0 are frequently shamed in the media, and then you realise how much the old, rich white dudes in charge of it hate women with a passion and want us all to feel insecure and cowed. Insecurity makes us buy things - clothes, lotions and potions, diets, surgery - all in the pursuit of this perfection which doesn't exist. I deserve to be happy no matter what I look like, and so do you. I stopped reading newspapers and magazines which are focussed on dieting (i.e. most of them!) and sought out places where different kinds of bodies are celebrated, such as Tumblr and plus size blogs. I surrounded myself with people who weren't shallow and I started to be unashamedly me. And I've never been happier. (Obviously the media also shames men who they don't consider 'normal' but men are treated far more kindly than women are by the media. If you don't agree, how many interviews have you seen where an actor was asked what he did to lose weight for a role, instead of meaty questions about his character? Actresses are always asked pathetic questions about their diet and exercise while actors are asked less sexist questions. How many times has Rebel Wilson's or Melissa McCarthy's weight been written about? How often does that happen to Nick Frost or Jonah Hill? I rest my case).






I'm wearing:

Fat bitch necklace, Black Heart Creatives
Shirt, old New Look Inspire, 
Grey acid wash jeggings, Yours Clothing

Please if you learn anything from my blog, learn you don't need ANYONE'S permission to love yourself. You can start doing that right now. It's OK to love yourself - I highly recommend it! Rip up the rule book. Recycle those magazines or make art collages out of them. ;) Only read media from sources who don't belittle women. Learn that you are loveable, no matter what you look like. Yes, YOU reading this right now. You don't need to be thin to be loved, or to love yourself. You don't need to be thin to be desired. You don't need to be thin to matter. You don't need to be thin to be a success. You can be all you want to be in a fat body, if you only believe in yourself. Surround yourself with people who see you for you, not a body type. Where possible, remove shallow idiots from your life, it will be SO worth it.

Thanks for reading, and I hope you feel cute.

Leah xoxo

Tuesday, 20 October 2015

OOTD - Relaxed rock chick

Hiya!

After my gig on Saturday I have rediscovered the fire in my belly and have taken a few sets of outfit shots which make me feel really......me. I wore this on Sunday for a quick trip to the shops in Bexhill so we popped to the beach to take photos.

PLUS SIZE ROCK CHICK OUTFIT

PLUS SIZE BLACK FAUX LEATHER BIKER VEST

I love these pointed toe shoes from Matalan. They were only £6! I do find their shoes to have quite flimsy soles at times, and at this price they aren't going to last forever, but the colour and style is so current that I don't mind.

PLUS SIZE BLACK HIGH LOW TOP

As you can see in the photo below, this high low top from Yours Clothing (last year) has a transparent mesh down the back which is quite a cool feature, but I don't think they do this particular top now.

PLUS SIZE ALTERNATIVE TASSELLED BAG BIKER VEST

PLUS SIZE ROCK CHICK ALT GIRL ALTERNATIVE CURVES

PLUS SIZE ROCK METAL OUTFIT BIKER JACKET

PLUS SIZE ALTERNATIVE OUTFIT OF THE DAY

I'm wearing:
Biker vest, past season New Look Inspire
Top, past season Yours Clothing
Leggings, Yours Clothing
Pointed oxblood flats (now sold out) Matalan
Necklace, Jewel Street - I can't link to it as the boutique it's from is offline at the moment

Tasselled bag, past season Yours Clothing
Chunky ring, past season New Look

Did you know that Matalan do wide fit shoes? I didn't until I noticed recently, and they're reasonably priced too. 

I got a LOT of filthy stares on this day. I'm used to getting stared at and I expect it - I'm no shrinking violet with my resting bitch face and dead eyed glare at wankers who stare in disdain at me. As I said to one idiot on Sunday 'Have a good long look, it's free!' Autographs and photos come at a premium though. ;) They can't handle my fabulous.

Thanks for reading! What makes YOU feel fabulous?
Leah xoxo

Monday, 19 October 2015

The rise of plus size

Hello!

I was asked to post this infographic by House of Fraser, and it has some interesting stuff in it I didn't know, so I thought I'd share.



Now I know in the past when I've been asked to share things like this (below) I've had some quite strong comments about wearing what the &!@$ you like, and good for you. These are guides to use if you want them, otherwise feel free to ignore them.


Also, I have to point out for clarity's sake that Tess Holliday is no longer a hero of mine, so please don't think posting this means I endorse her. There have been allegations made (serious allegations by hundreds of people) that she has defrauded them out of money. Just Google it, that's all I'm going to say on the matter. Yes, I AM a fan of what she's done for the plus size movement, but I'm not a fan of her personally any more.

Who else thinks the mention of the word stout used to describe plus size people in past times is hilarious?! It makes me think of the nursery rhyme 'I'm a little teapot'. Haha.

Shop House of Fraser

Leah xoxo

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