Outfit | Feeling cute not critical

Hello lovelies,

I heard it said somewhere a long time ago that bloggers shouldn't post outfits on their blog that they wouldn't wear out of the house, but I say your blog, your rules. Hell, your life your rules, and if you don't blog then feel free to share selfies on social media when you feel cute. Snap some photos and put them out there whether you'd go out of the house dressed like that or not. Here are some photos of me feeling cute. :) Now I see the rounded belly, the big arse, and I choose to feel cute, not critical of myself.

You know, I can be self-critical with the best of them, but today I choose not to. It's refreshing to turn that nagging voice off mid-criticism. Our feelings about our bodies are often dependent on something happening....... 'I'll be happy when X happens.' We defer our happiness until some point in the future when we finally live up to that nagging voice in our head. Why not strive to love yourself now? Whether you're happy with your body or not, just realise you deserve happiness and all good things as much as anyone else does. Your worth does not and should not depend on what you look like. Even if you are aiming to transform your body in some way, starting off from a point of love is the best way, because when you love yourself, you treat yourself better. You deserve to treat yourself kindly.

The story of how I got to be confident goes like this: I realised that society's rules about who 'gets' to be valued are a crock of shit. If you read the average newspaper or magazine you quickly realise that unless you're uber thin and so young you're trailing afterbirth the media is incredibly cruel. It's incredibly cruel to women in particular, but particularly older women and women they see as outside the realm of attractiveness - like fat women. Actually, not even just fat women. Perfectly 'normal' women who aren't a size 0 are frequently shamed in the media, and then you realise how much the old, rich white dudes in charge of it hate women with a passion and want us all to feel insecure and cowed. Insecurity makes us buy things - clothes, lotions and potions, diets, surgery - all in the pursuit of this perfection which doesn't exist. I deserve to be happy no matter what I look like, and so do you. I stopped reading newspapers and magazines which are focussed on dieting (i.e. most of them!) and sought out places where different kinds of bodies are celebrated, such as Tumblr and plus size blogs. I surrounded myself with people who weren't shallow and I started to be unashamedly me. And I've never been happier. (Obviously the media also shames men who they don't consider 'normal' but men are treated far more kindly than women are by the media. If you don't agree, how many interviews have you seen where an actor was asked what he did to lose weight for a role, instead of meaty questions about his character? Actresses are always asked pathetic questions about their diet and exercise while actors are asked less sexist questions. How many times has Rebel Wilson's or Melissa McCarthy's weight been written about? How often does that happen to Nick Frost or Jonah Hill? I rest my case).

I'm wearing:

Fat bitch necklace, Black Heart Creatives
Shirt, old New Look Inspire, 
Grey acid wash jeggings, Yours Clothing

Please if you learn anything from my blog, learn you don't need ANYONE'S permission to love yourself. You can start doing that right now. It's OK to love yourself - I highly recommend it! Rip up the rule book. Recycle those magazines or make art collages out of them. ;) Only read media from sources who don't belittle women. Learn that you are loveable, no matter what you look like. Yes, YOU reading this right now. You don't need to be thin to be loved, or to love yourself. You don't need to be thin to be desired. You don't need to be thin to matter. You don't need to be thin to be a success. You can be all you want to be in a fat body, if you only believe in yourself. Surround yourself with people who see you for you, not a body type. Where possible, remove shallow idiots from your life, it will be SO worth it.

Thanks for reading, and I hope you feel cute.

Leah xoxo

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