My Christmas

Hiya lovelies,

I hope you had a lovely Christmas (if you celebrate it.) I had a good one - we've certainly been busy!

Our Christmas, like many others in the UK, started off wetly. We had a horrible scary journey to visit our families. We encountered an accident which closed a major road resulting in a major detour virtually as soon as we left home, then we came across a flooded road, then a telegraph pole which was swinging in the wind, and finally a raging torrent. I'm so glad it was day time or else it would've been absolutely terrifying.

The first flooded road we came across wasn't too bad as we could drive through it quickly. The second flooded road was one which normally sits in a dip between two fields which both have gentle winding streams. Because of the recent downpours the streams were now massive lakes with no grass to be seen anywhere and the road was under at least 2 feet of water. All the cars going through in front of us were 4x4s, and then there was us in our small Toyota. As we got to the lowest point in the road the wake of the water was nearly as high as our windows and I was seriously shitting it. My husband is a nutjob. The force of the water ripped our front number plate off! 

1. Flood on A21
2. Wobbly telegraph pole
3. Flood near Bodiam Castle
4. And again - I think the water is brown from me cacking it!

1. Why am I yellow?!
2. Christmas dinner
3. My mum
4. Classy Christmas - Lambrini with lunch

1. My hubby and my brother
2. Me looking shagged after 4 hours sleep
3. My aunt, the cook
4. In the Christmas spirit

1. Pretty onyx earrings from the ma and pa in law
2. Hubs in a gift bag
3. Canary Wharf in the clouds
4. Pretty Christmas trees

On Christmas Eve we went to Kent to see my mum's side of the family, with a quick stop off with my dad's side of the family to drop off the presents. We had Christmas Day lunch at my aunt's house, then went to London to see hub's parents. After an hour or so we headed off to his grandad's house, where all the family gather on Christmas night. There were about 30+ people there, which was down on last year's numbers, thankfully - it gets stiflingly hot and crowded as it is. My brother- and sister-in-law brought the baby, who's now 8 months old and as cute as a button. I was blowing raspberries on her cheeks, which she loved. I also sang to her ('All I want for Christmas is my two front teeth') and she was kicking her legs in time. Poor babe must be tone deaf! ;)

On Boxing Day we went to the cinema to see The Desolation of Smaug again. It's even better the second time around. Yesterday we spent the day with my mum and step dad as it was my mum's birthday. We spent the day going around the shops before going to see an aunt and uncle for a chat and a cuppa, then going to see another aunt and uncle for a Chinese takeaway.

I had a really good night's sleep on Christmas night after consuming copious amounts of vodka, but other than that sweet respite I've felt as rough as a porcupine's arse. I've been weak, shaky, nauseous and my legs were so tremulous at one point I thought the ground was shaking underneath me. I'll be going to see the doctor as soon as I can drag butt there.

It's been lovely to see everyone but I've been a bit detached as I've felt so poorly.

Christmas run down
Rows witnessed: 1
Floods: 2
Sprouts eaten: 24
Bacon sarnies: 2
Alcoholic beverages: 9
Family members seen: 50+
Swear words deployed: 327 (at least 290 during flood crossing #2.)
Vol au vents scoffed: 5

How was your crimbo?

Thanks for reading.

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